Julia Cougo e Silva 1D
I arrived here in New York around 6:30
a.m. in the morning. Since I came in June, it's already very hot. I
arrived at the airport JFK. I came straight to the "The Quin Hotel". What a wonderful hotel! I'm in love with every
detail here. It seems like I'm in an endless dream! We are going to stay
here for 45 days. I am 18 years old now and I am beginning the 2nd period of Animal Husbandry. I got a scholarship to improve my English and study
the 2nd period of college. I came together with 5 friends from college. We are with 10
other Brazilians. I left my things in the hotel room and went for breakfast. How
wonderful! I want to have a breakfast like this every day in the hotel restaurant and
cafe! As we arrived in the morning, I went to visit the city a little.
I went walking to the Apple Store, which is in a cube shape. I wonder why I did not want to leave it... it was so beautiful! I wanted to stay there forever! I spent a lot of time in the Apple Store, which stays in 5th avenue. It is worth knowing.
I went to the Rockefeller center too. Rockfeller Center and a complex with shops and cafes. I did not know where to look and everything was wonderful here. Then, I went to visit Gucci and Gap Outlets among others...
Today everything was wonderful. I'm delighted! Everything
was perfect! I'm feeling very happy and fulfilled. It was all good. I
did not want to go to the hotel even when the day was over. I wanted
to know everything in a day. I finished the day watching the sunset from the top of the building
"Top of the Rock". From here, one can see the Central Park and many more
places beyond the horizon, as "The One Wold Trade Center"! At the end, I came to the hotel. I want tomorrow to be better than
today. My first day of school is tomorrow, and it starts early in the
morning. That's it!
Ju, your text is great. What was still missing and I corrected: correct use of capital letters, some incorrect grammar (not much), absence of the final sentence of the first paragraph with the names of the places visited today and you forgot to write about each place in different paragraphs. The grade was 8,5. Good job!
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